Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot Runs For Mayor In ACoN Town

I'm just going to come right out and say it; I'm not going to imply it, nor am I going to flower it up with pretty words. Let there be no mistake, I am making a direct comparison between Caliban's Sister and Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot (ie Penguin), a DC comics supervillain from Batman. I see a major resemblance between the two. Just saying.

From Batman Returns (1992):  

The Penguin: Touring the riot scene. Gravely assessing the devastation. Upstanding mayor stuff.
Batman: You're not the mayor.
The Penguin:
Things change.

The Penguin: True. I was their number one son, and they treated me like number two.

The Penguin: You're just jealous, because I'm a genuine freak and you have to wear a mask!
Batman: You might be right.

The Penguin: You gotta admit I played this stinkin' city like a harp from hell.

The Penguin: They wouldn't put me on a pedestal, so I'm layin' 'em on a slab!

The Penguin: Just relax. I'll take care of the squealing, wretched, pinhead puppets of Gotham!

The Penguin: You didn't invite me, so I CRASHED!

The Penguin: Check it out. We're gonna disassemble his Batmobile and turn it into an H-bomb on wheels.
Catwoman: No, no, he'd have even more power as a martyr. To destroy Batman, we must first turn him into what he hates the most. Namely us.   

The Penguin: [to a crowd of voters] I may have saved the mayor's baby, but I refuse to save a mayor who stood by helpless *as a baby*, while Gotham City was ravaged by a disease that turned eagle scouts into crazed clowns and happy homemakers into catwomen!

The Penguin: Actually, this is all just a bad dream. You're at home, in bed, heavily sedated, resting comfortably, dying from the carcinogens you personally spewed in a lifetime of profiteering. Tragic irony or poetic justice, you tell me.

Maximillian 'Max' Shreck: I wish I could hand out World Peace and Unconditional Love, wrapped in a big bow.
The Penguin: [Watching from behind the sewer grill] Oh, but you can! Oh, but you will!

From New Earth:

The Penguin: Oh, c'mon... I've wanted nothing to do with this psycho from the start. I do one favor for someone and suddenly I'm taking all the heat for someone else's dirty work. It's just not fair!

The Penguin: But one thing, at least, was clear to me from a tender age... it's a cold, cold world.

The Penguin: What impresses me most about me is that, given everything I went through, everything I overcame... I didn't just get back up. I didn't merely find my feet...I found something else, something I was great at.

The Penguin: Do you ever question it? Why you protect them? And why you drag me in here, even knowing my lawyers will have me out within the hour?


  1. A fight about scolding that ends with...a REAL BIG scolding...hmmm.

    We've been bloggin for years and we don't need a mayor. We have minds of our own.

    1. So upsi. You have been blogging for three years and Jonsi close to the same. Have you ever had a problem like this before? I have only been blogging for a year so I don't have the tenure you do.
      So this person who has two weeks experience for every year of what you two guys have is telling you what is appropriate and what is not?

    2. Thank you so much for your input, Q. I really value everything you have to say and I want you to know how special you are.

      Now to your question: nothing like this has ever happened. I never should have taken that summer off. Leave for a few months and the place is trashed, TRASHED I tell you.

      The long arm of the Cumbayah movement is sweeping the net as we speak, looking for targets. Will you be next?

  2. I think a lot of all this it to blame on the impersonal nature of the internet. You miss all the inflections in a person's voice. All the nuance of body language.
    I think if I could be in the same room with her, and count how many pairs of latex gloves she put on before shaking my hand, it would be a lot more telling about her true spirit.

  3. Jonsi I want to thank you for these kind and wise words. Words filled with hope and wisdom. Words I can find strength in. Words of sustenance. Words of portent. I feel validated and solidified.
    Please do not pull this thread. Add to it. And let thine voice ring true.

    1. I may just accidentally delete your comments here. And then I'll be sure to offer for you to resubmit them. And then I'll delete the post. And then I'll rewrite it and post it again. And then I'll ask you to resubmit your comments again.

  4. What an immense talent you are for having the ability to rewrite things in a manner most conducive to enabling us meerkats to stick our little noses out of pour burrows and see if the coast is clear.
    Revise away.
    When you do, can you remake me without having such a honking beer gut?

    1. Of course! Are you satisfied with the size of your weinerschnitzel? I could change that too if you'd like.

    2. Jonsi. Just another one of your distortions. That's Peinerschnitzel. With a "P"

    3. *ahem* it's a SCHWANZSTUCKER.


    4. BAH HAHAHA. Peinerschnitzel. Schwanzstucker. Those are the kind of German words I really like to get my hands on.

    5. Tony Danza approves of this message.

    6. Hey Gladys. You name your dick, what you want to name your dick. And I'll name my dick, what I want to name mine.

  5. You guys this is dangerous anger bonding and I feel that as your friend I should stop you from doing something you will truly regret: speaking your minds.

    Please stop now before the whole city of ACoN is overrun by your terror. This archaic rage must be stopped. If I have to put a cork in your mouths all the way from Chicago, by gum, I will suppress you from afar.

    But if you must toss bombs, be sure to get your hands bloody too - a show of solidarity. I know I have a grenade in my purse I'm planning to let blow and lose a leg to prove my loyalty to recovery.

  6. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OWwOJlOI1nU

  7. I gave up on that blog after her response to my last comment there that can be summed up as: "I'm sorry if you felt scolded by my telling you that your behavior was inappropriate, wrong & disappointing. I didn't intone any scolding by dictating proper behavior as I see it, so any feelings of chastisement are all on you, you illogical dimwit."

    The non-apology. And I'm too sensitive and reactive to my history and not nearly as evolved as she is in recovery. I'm getting a headache from the eye rolling I've got going on here. :-/

    1. Vicarious,

      I took note of that non-apology she lobbed at you at the time. I think there has been a lot of sly, underhanded shit going down, in moments like the one you mentioned as well as others. I think Cal's Sis tried to declare herself Mayor and didn't like that we said, "Hell no!"

    2. Man! No body can turn a phrase like Vicarious.

  8. VR this is all my fault I should have known to step in and tell you how to feel and what to do so you would not overstep any boundaries of appropriate conduct. Please screen any and all actions through me from now on so we can avoid this unfortunate outcome in the future.

    are you also one of my evil minions, mobbing and wielding torches? here let me do your thinking for you.

  9. Wonder how no contact skype Sunday went?

  10. You know what's funny is that she claims that ACoNs are not only hypersensitive, but that we are often wrongly sensitive, taking offense where none is made. Well, I can't speak for all ACoNs, but I know this is untrue of me. To imply that I don't know when someone is telling me how I ought to behave is by itself an insult. If I didn't know better, I would've felt gaslit by her response to my comment.

    But then again, she's got a bunch of backers who hear her as sincere and kind, which baffles the shit out of me. She exemplifies the "contempt" she accuses others of displaying. Her latest post is a big giant lecture about how to handle ourselves, we of the out-of-control projecting anger issues, because she clearly has seen the light.

    She's a bully shrouded in sanctimony. I may not have achieved her level of enlightenment, but I'm along enough in my recovery to know when someone is hanging out on their high horse and trying to trample out dissent to make herself the reigning voice of "truth".

    And there is no way that her parting comment to me "Logic sucks" wasn't a snide poke at me. Claiming "logic" as her champion is one of my highly-illogical mother's favorites. In her head, she's logical because her way is the only way and anyone else's is just plain moronic.

    But, hey, I tried to engage her in a discussion about how others experienced her "call for compassion". I guess she told me what's what. :P

    1. I'm finding more and more evidence of moments when Cal subtly attacks people without ever fucking naming names. And that shit kills me because it's so damn underhanded. I did not catch the one you mentioned, but I totally see it.

      Vi, I personally think you're right on the money here. I'm glad you haven't been fooled by her:

      "But then again, she's got a bunch of backers who hear her as sincere and kind, which baffles the shit out of me." The Flying Monkeys and followers of narcs have always baffled me too. Doesn't make any sense to me that people can be that blind.

    2. Bringing us back to the name of your blog: open your eyes. and see. the truth. is in the details.

  11. I'm gonna go ahead and run a tear on that sweet riff, VR: trampling out dissent.

    Man we need a ULB jam sesh.

  12. And for gawds sake, put in footnotes to be deleted later, OK?