A dream (in italics). My analysis follows each section of the dream.
DH and I decided, upon waking, to get up and go to NMIL's house. It was so early that our babies were still sleeping and we wanted to go right then because we somehow knew that no one was home at her house. So we got in the car and I drove us to her house. Once there, DH immediately went to NMIL's car, as though he knew there was going to be something in there that we'd want to see. There was, but I was already in the kitchen, looking for evidence. I think I went to the kitchen because, in most people's houses, the kitchen is sort of the "heart" of the home. Most people keep their calendars there, or drop important things off on the counter to inspect at a later time. So I went there to find my "evidence," even though I had no idea what it would be or what, precisely, it would be "evidence" of, I just felt I would find something important there. Could be a nod to my behaviors in my waking life, where I'm always searching for "evidence" of what NMIL is up to and what her next attack on DH will look like.
While I was searching in the kitchen, DH came running in and told me he'd found stuff in the back of NMIL's car that I would want to see. He seemed excited, and I was worried that it was a "good" sort of excitement (like a kid on Christmas) instead of an anxious excitement, which was how I felt and how I sort of thought he should feel too. I know, there I was, in my dream world, imposing my feelings on DH. But I just couldn't help but worry that DH was having too much "fun" snooping around in his mother's stuff, when I believed he should be taking things really seriously and be aware that we could get in trouble for what we were doing! I mean, I knew we were breaking and entering, and the feeling that someone could come home at any minute and catch us was always dancing on the edge of my consciousness.
I asked DH what he found in his mother's car and he indicated that it was stuff for the baby. He said there were two things, two gifts for the baby, and that he'd go back and get them. I went back to my search in the kitchen, where I had narrowed down my search to a huge pile of notes and shit on the counter. Mostly, I noticed a lot of junk as I sifted through the pile: doctor's receipts, post-it-notes with useless information scribbled on them, pages and pages of blank paper, in various shapes, sizes and colors. But in the midst of all of that crap, I did see a couple things that caught my attention. Upon waking, the only thing I remember was a piece of paper in the shape of a bookmark. All I knew was that it was a "thank you" note of some kind, and that it was addressed to me, except that whoever had written it had used my maiden name and they spelled it wrong three or four times before they finally got it right. I didn't know who it was from, or what else was on it, but I somehow knew that the person who had sent it to her had intended that she turn around and send it to me, which I knew she would never do, and explained why it was sitting in a pile of junk on HER kitchen counter. And then I dropped it before I could see more and began frantically looking for it again because I felt that the information on the note was very important. When I woke from the dream, this seemed like one of the most important parts: Amidst a mountain of crap and unimportant stuff, NMIL had one nugget of information that was important to me for some reason. My thought was that she either realized it's importance and that's why she was holding on to it, or else she didn't know of it's importance, but was keeping it anyway because there was a remote possibility I might want or need it and she flat our refused to give it to me. It was mine, by right, but she wanted to keep it for herself and keep it from me. I also thought it was interesting that whoever had sent it to me didn't know me very well, or else was trying to insult me by using my maiden name instead of my married name, and spelling it wrong to boot. Furthermore, it was someone who CLEARLY didn't know NMIL very well, or else they wouldn't have sent it to her if they really intended for me to get it. I remember thinking something like, "Hmm. So she's getting my mail here and clearly NOT sending it to me."
DH pulled out one of the gifts from the back of NMIL's car that was intended for the baby. It was a pink booster seat, in a box. It looked used and junky and I thought, "No, no, that's all wrong!" Our baby is a boy not a girl. At first I thought maybe she intended it for DD, but then I shook myself of the inclination to give NMIL the benefit of the doubt and said to myself, "No, it's definitely for DS. She either got him something pink because she doesn't care that he's a boy and that it would be insulting; or because she intended to be insulting." I also thought it was inappropriate because DS was not old enough to be using the booster seat, and WE ALREADY HAD ONE for DD and SHE KNEW we already had one. All pretty self-explanatory, I think. My subconscious was already doing the dream analysis for me. Also, I got the sense that she was not even going to send us the gifts that she had bought because she was really just using the fact that she had purchased them as proof to other people that she still 'cared' about her son and grandchildren. Maybe the gifts were in her car because she was going to return them. We took them because I felt entitled to them, even though they were "all wrong" and I didn't really want them.
I asked DH what the second gift was and he said he didn't know because he hadn't gotten a good enough look at it the first time and because it had suddenly disappeared. I felt that this was not an indication that DH was lying to me about it suddenly disappearing (I mean, in reality, that would be very strange for an object to disappear from the back of the car if no one had removed it) but that he was being unobservant about the circumstances (something he was trained to be) and that it had, in fact, been removed after he walked away from the car the first time. It frustrated me because I wanted to know what the second gift had been and knew I never would.
DH then produced two bath mats, which were not the second gift he had originally told me about, but somehow I knew they were for us as well and that he just hadn't found them on his first search of the car. Bath mats. Pretty useless in the scheme of things. And it's not like we NEED bath mats. If we did, we'd just go out and buy them ourselves. I think the bath mats were an indication of how little NMIL knows about us, or will ever know.
When DH went back out to the car again, I continued my search, more frantically now, for the document that I had dropped. I knew time was running out. Sure enough, DH yelled from outside, "Oh shit! It's my mother!" and I had to drop everything I was holding and run back outside. NMIL was pulling up behind our car, trying to block us in from escaping, and DH yelled, "We're just leaving!" I thought that was funny because he made it sound like we'd just come for a visit, instead of to snoop and steal things, and decided we were going to leave because no one had been home...even though the person we had been coming to "visit" was just pulling in. We got in our car, and I managed to get it out of the tight spot NMIL had put it in. I think I did like an 18-point turn, but then I finally got it out of the spot and we drove away. No one followed us. Just like in my observations about narcissists in real life: when you walk away, they don't follow you.
We got back to my mother's house and I told her that we had gone to NMIL's house. My mother looked at me, worried, and said, "No, Jonsi, don't do this." And I said, "No mom, it's alright. We weren't going there to talk to NMIL. We were just going there to find stuff and steal it." Then I woke up. That last part had me laughing. No mom, we weren't going there to talk to NMIL (what would be the point of that?) We were going to find stuff...and steal it! Naturally. But besides that, while I was fighting the urge that "stealing is wrong" and "we were breaking and entering and could get in trouble for it!" I justified what we had done because I felt we had a right to things that were ours, and because by sheer virtue of the fact that NMIL was keeping things from us, we should have them.