Thursday, June 28, 2012

High Five

And the high-five prize goes to Tundra Woman, for guessing correctly in my Can You Spot The Narcissist game! Here's your high five from Jonsi, TW: **high five!**

I have to say though, everyone's guesses were superb and the reasoning behind them were spot-on. I didn't recognize any of the other people who had answered the question that NMIL's "friend" asked, but I'd say, given some of their three-word answers, it could very well be that they are narcissists too. I'm thinking maybe it wasn't as easy to spot the narcissist as I thought it would be, simply because there were a couple of three-word answers that could be indicators of narcissistic thought patterns. To recap, one of NMIL's farcebook friends put up the following status: You and I are handcuffed together in the back of a Cop car! Using ONLY 3 words, what would you say to me? And, now you know that NMIL's three word response was, I love you!! :)

The reason why I found this to be disturbing was because, given the context of the hypothetical situation (i.e. both people had presumably been caught doing something wrong and were now being arrested for their offense) an "I-love-you-exclamation-exclamation-smiley-face" reaction would be ridiculously inappropriate. Her answer makes me wonder, "Damn, bitch. Did you even read the fucking question?"

And after I read her response, I thought that it wasn't surprising at all. This woman is famous for behaving inappropriately given the context of every situation she's ever found herself in. I mean, this is the same woman who continues to send DH emails that are totally incongruous with the relationship we currently have with her. She's so busy smiling her little smiley faces and twirling her hair innocently that she pretends she hasn't even noticed that we haven't spoken to her in well over a year and that the last time we did it was to tell her to fuck off.

Yeah, NMIL would sit in the back of a cop car smiling her creepy little smile, quite sure that no one could possibly prove she had done anything wrong, professing love for her partner in crime while being hauled off to the slammer, before claiming innocence and blaming her "friend" for whatever they had been caught for. NMIL's hands could be covered in the shit she was playing with before getting caught, the police could have walked in, catching her "brown-handed," and she'd still claim innocence.

Her answer reminds me of an instance last year when I read an inappropriate comment she left on one of Pig's statuses some time last year. Pig left up a status in memorandum of a colleague who had passed away recently. He even included a photo of the two of them standing together, which he indicated had been the last time they had seen each other. Amidst the sympathetic commentary from others, NMIL's words stuck out like a sore thumb: "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Piiiiggggg! I loooooove youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. I miss youuuuuuu! Okay byeeeeeee!" It was epically inappropriate, again, given the context of the message being shared, and quite frankly, scared me.

This bitch straight up sold her soul to the devil, and she did it a long time ago.


  1. It's because she has no feelings. No empathy. She's nothing.

  2. Since VR picked my first choice I looked again-not only was the comment childishly inappropriate, the smiley face gave it away. Especially as this was a "Public Forum" so to speak. It's all about appearances and she wants to make sure (an over-compensation, IMO) everyone/anyone/who ever "wanders by" sees her polishing her halo, her "image" as a "sweet, loving (young) woman." I bet she's an expert at Photo-Shop for her OWN pix.
    Underneath that is a huge amount of hatred, jealousy and rage. She's unlikely to throw a full-blown Narc Rage in public, although she'd stomp her lil' Manolo-clad foot and with hands on hips, lower lip quivering, squeak out "It's not FAIR!" This woman feels cheated by life in every way, the Perpetual Helpless/Hapless Victim. "Dumb like a fox." She's aware time is passing her by and is becoming increasingly frantic to "GET IT! ALL OF IT:" The most current fashions, labels, addresses, accessories of every kind, attention, "friends"-not of her own age, of course. No normal woman in her age group would have anything in common with her. Besides, she "likes" young people! She's really just a young woman "at heart" as well! The mirror is telling her the truth. And that's terrifying.
    She's not aging well, internally OR externally: Already she's scheming how to get her hot hands on that new $1500. Creme de la Mere and a referral to the most expensive hair stylist/colorist in a given area. She's currently playing "Let's Make A Deal" with NSIL over the contents of daughter's closet before NSIL packs to go off to college. She hasn't learned just because you can fit into an item of clothing doesn't mean you SHOULD. NMIL knows she needs some man with $$$ to afford the lifestyle to which she feels entitled and the "competition" with the genuinely young and beautiful is getting more intense every year. She hasn't internalized ANY of her life experiences and hasn't learned or grown as a result. She will be a perpetual toddler and no where will that be more apparent than in PRIVATE. THEN you'll see the true frightening Narc Rages, the contorted face, spittle-flying screaming tantrums.
    That old song, "Lying Eyes" fits her, IMO: "You can't hide your lying eyes, and your smile has been disguised, thought by now you'd realize, there ain't no way to hide your lyin' eyes...My oh my, you sure know how to arrange things, you set it up so well, so carefully...." etc.
    If she wasn't so damn nasty she'd be ALMOST pitiful. But show her an oz. of compassion and she'll "show you" a ton of pain. She'll stop you like a bug-just because she CAN.

  3. That is one creepy statement...and something written from my mother's playbook. They are so socially ignorant that they don't know how to respond appropriately, make ridiculous guesses as what to do, and fail A LOT. Absurdity....that is a great descriptive word for narcissists.

  4. I think if I knew her, I would've been creeped out by the "I love you." by itself, I thought it could've been one of those things between buddies -- like they'd had a hoot getting arrested again (presuming it was for streaking or something) or out of fear. I didn't pick up on the smiley face, but hearing how she responded to Pig's sad picture post, it seems like she is just looking for the opportunity to say something to get attention and the less appropriate the response, the more it sticks out.


    I love TW's assessment.

    1. Oh, you know what? I read it as some sort of phoney exuberant crap. Like if she said it in person she'd be all bouncing up and down, giddy like a little kid, wildly and inappropriately shouting, "I LOOOOOVE YOOOUUU!" And in part, it was the exclamation points and smiley face that did it. Like, a somber, heartfelt, "I love you" might not have necessarily been so wildly inappropriate, but how she'd say it totally would be.

      Also, I'm pretty sure she does not in fact LOVE the friend who she got "arrested" with. According to DH, she would consider that person a friend, but they aren't "besties 4 evsies" or anything. So the proclamation of love comes across as being even more disingenuous in that case.

  5. Wow I didn't get that at all! I thought the I love you :)!! person was just someone being cute. My first guess was "You did it". He sounds like an ass anyway. My second guess was "what's that smell?" but that could either be a nice guy making a mean joke or an asshole making a mean joke. But now that I know it's your NMIL, that makes more sense. It's hard to tell. I guess you just don't expect that from a 45 year-old woman! Haha, it's like when you talk to a stranger online and they sound sexy and young then they send you a picture and it turns out to be this 45 year old woman and you're like WTF!

    1. "I thought the I love you :)!! person was just someone being cute."

      Exactly. I guess it was hard to see that and the more obvious answers were the "you did its" and whatnot. But now that you know it's NMIL, the I love you! seems a bit creepier. There ain't nothing "cute" about a narcissist. They're fucking creepers.